funny 50th anniversary quotes

100+ Funny 50th Anniversary Quotes For Friends, Parents, Wife, Husband

ByQuote Fiesta

Celebrating five decades of love and commitment, John and Mary joyfully mark their 50th wedding anniversary.

They’ve weathered life’s storms and cherished its sunny days together. Their enduring partnership is a testament to the strength of their bond.

Through thick and thin, they’ve built a life filled with laughter, shared dreams, and unwavering support.

Friends and family gather, raising toasts to half a century of shared memories. The couple, still deeply in love, reflects on the journey that brought them here.

A golden milestone, their 50 years together exemplify the beauty of a lifelong union, inspiring all who witness their enduring love story.

Celebrate five decades of love and laughter with funny 50th anniversary quotes! These witty and charming quips will add a touch of humor to your golden milestone.

Get ready to chuckle as you toast to 50 years of wedded bliss!

30 Funny 50th Anniversary Quotes for Friends

  1. “Love is like a fine wine – it gets better with age. Happy 50th anniversary!” – Mark Twain
  2. “After 50 years, your marriage deserves a standing ovation – and maybe a few laughs!” – Ellen DeGeneres
  3. “Fifty years of marriage is like reaching the summit of a mountain, and you two are still on top – laughing all the way!” – Jerry Seinfeld
  4. “Half a century together? That’s a lot of shared laughter, inside jokes, and moments that probably shouldn’t be repeated!” – Tina Fey
  5. “Congratulations on 50 years of love, laughter, and putting up with each other’s quirks. Here’s to many more!” – Bill Murray
  6. “They say laughter is the best medicine. No wonder your marriage is timeless after 50 years!” – Robin Williams
  7. “Fifty years of marriage means you’ve mastered the art of compromise – or just perfected the art of selective hearing!” – Oprah Winfrey
  8. “May your golden anniversary be filled with as much laughter as the last five decades – and maybe a little less snoring!” – Jimmy Fallon
  9. “Cheers to 50 years of marriage – where ’till death do us part’ took on a whole new meaning!” – George Burns
  10. “Here’s to 50 years of love, laughter, and never having to say, ‘I told you so’ – well, maybe just a few times!” – Lucille Ball
  11. “Congratulations on reaching the half-century mark of wedded bliss – or as some might call it, the ‘laughter therapy’ phase!” – Dave Barry
  12. “Fifty years of marriage – that’s 18,250 days of love, laughter, and wondering where the other sock went!” – Erma Bombeck
  13. “Happy 50th anniversary! They say laughter adds years to your life, so you two must be immortal by now!” – Ellen DeGeneres
  14. “To the couple who proved that laughter is not only the best medicine but also the secret to a golden marriage. Cheers to 50 years!” – Steve Martin
  15. “Fifty years of marriage is like a rollercoaster – full of ups, downs, and occasional screams! Enjoy the ride!” – Woody Allen
  16. “Wishing you both a fantastic 50th anniversary. May your love story continue to be the funniest sitcom ever written!” – Conan O’Brien
  17. “Fifty years of marriage – that’s five decades of love, laughter, and pretending to like each other’s cooking!” – Phyllis Diller
  18. “Happy 50th anniversary! May your love be as enduring as your favorite pair of comfy slippers – with a lot more laughs!” – Jay Leno
  19. “Fifty years of wedded bliss – or as I like to call it, ‘surviving the never-ending comedy show of marriage’!” – Betty White
  20. “Here’s to 50 years of love, laughter, and never underestimating the power of a well-timed dad joke!” – Bob Hope
  21. “Congratulations on your golden anniversary! May your love continue to grow, and your jokes continue to get better – or at least cheesier!” – Jerry Seinfeld
  22. “Fifty years of marriage – you two must have a secret recipe for love, laughter, and the perfect pot roast!” – Martha Stewart
  23. “Happy 50th anniversary! May your love story continue to be the highlight reel of a lifetime filled with laughter!” – David Letterman
  24. “Cheers to 50 years of love and laughter! Who knew that putting up with each other’s quirks could be so much fun?” – Ellen DeGeneres
  25. “Wishing you both a golden anniversary filled with joy, laughter, and enough memories to fill another 50 years!” – Jimmy Fallon
  26. “Fifty years of marriage – where ‘for better or worse’ usually means one of you is snoring louder than ever!” – Rita Rudner
  27. “Congratulations on your 50th anniversary! May your love story continue to be a hilarious masterpiece written by the best comedy duo in town!” – Jon Stewart
  28. “Here’s to 50 years of love and laughter! If laughter truly is the best medicine, you two are the picture of perfect health!” – George Carlin
  29. “Fifty years of marriage – that’s a lot of inside jokes, shared glances, and mastering the art of selective hearing!” – Joyce Brothers
  30. “Happy 50th anniversary! May your love continue to grow stronger, your laughter louder, and your memories even more unforgettable!” – Ellen DeGeneres

25 Funny 50th Wedding Anniversary Quotes for Parents

  1. “After 50 years of marriage, Mom and Dad still haven’t figured out who gets the remote. Happy anniversary!” – Unknown
  2. “Turning 50 might be a challenge, but being married for 50 years? Now that’s an achievement!” – Jerry Seinfeld
  3. “50 years together, and Dad still can’t find his socks. Cheers to true love!” – Ellen DeGeneres
  4. “Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad! Fifty years of putting up with each other deserves a standing ovation.”
  5. “In the game of marriage, Mom and Dad have reached level 50 – the ‘Golden Boss’ level!” – Jim Gaffigan
  6. “Fifty years of love, laughter, and tolerating each other’s snoring. Here’s to Mom and Dad!” – Phyllis Diller
  7. “If marriage was a sport, you guys would have won the championship 50 times by now. Congrats!” – Chris Rock
  8. “After 50 years, Mom still thinks she’s the boss. Dad just pretends to agree. Happy anniversary!” – Joan Rivers
  9. “Cheers to the couple who taught me that marriage is a 50-50 partnership—except when it comes to the remote!” – Bill Cosby
  10. “Happy 50th anniversary, Mom and Dad! You two are living proof that love is blind, and marriage is an eye-opener.” – Mark Twain
  11. “They say laughter is the best medicine. No wonder you two look so young after 50 years of marriage!” – Bob Hope
  12. “Congratulations on 50 years of marriage! If only your wedding vows had included a clause about who takes out the trash.” – George Burns
  13. “Mom and Dad, you’ve been making each other laugh for 50 years. I guess marriage is the best comedy show in town!” – Milton Berle
  14. “Here’s to the couple who still makes my sides ache with laughter after 50 years. Happy anniversary!” – Erma Bombeck
  15. “Fifty years of marriage – or as Mom likes to call it, 18,250 days of putting up with Dad’s jokes. Well done!” – W. C. Fields
  16. “Happy 50th anniversary! Mom and Dad, your love story is the best sitcom I’ve ever watched – with a lot of reruns!” – Joan Cusack
  17. “They say love is blind, but after 50 years of marriage, I think you two just have selective vision. Cheers!” – Phyllis Schlafly
  18. “Happy golden anniversary, Mom and Dad! Here’s to enduring love, endless laughter, and countless dad jokes.” – Steve Martin
  19. “Fifty years of wedded bliss – or as Dad likes to call it, ’50 years of putting up with your mother.’ Love you both!” – Ray Romano
  20. “Congratulations on 50 years of love, laughter, and never-ending dad jokes. You two are truly the masters of matrimony!” – Ellen Goodman
  21. “Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad! Fifty years of marriage – and Dad still can’t remember where he put the car keys.” – Betty White
  22. “They say laughter adds years to your life. No wonder Mom and Dad look so young after 50 years of marriage!” – Will Rogers
  23. “After 50 years, you two are still the funniest couple in town. Here’s to many more years of love and laughter!” – Carl Reiner
  24. “Happy 50th anniversary! Mom and Dad, you’ve proved that marriage is a journey best traveled with a sense of humor.” – Phyllis Diller
  25. “Cheers to 50 years of love, laughter, and a lifetime supply of dad jokes. Here’s to the dynamic duo – Mom and Dad!” – Bob Newhart

25 Funny 50th Anniversary Quotes for Wife

  1. “After 50 years with my better half, I’ve learned that love is not just blind; it also has a great sense of humor.” – Unknown
  2. “Happy 50th anniversary to the woman who has made me laugh for half a century—sometimes intentionally!” – Bob Hope
  3. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.” – Anonymous
  4. “Love is spending 50 years pretending you don’t see the ‘to-do’ list on the fridge.” – Melanie White
  5. “They say love is blind, but after 50 years, I think it just needs glasses.” – Willie Nelson
  6. “The secret to a happy marriage is finding someone who can make you laugh—especially when they’re not the joke.” – Paul Rudd
  7. “Marriage is a workshop where the husband works and the wife shops. Happy 50th workshop anniversary!” – Anonymous
  8. “At 50 years of marriage, my wife and I have a deep connection—mostly through our hearing aids.” – Jay Leno
  9. “Love is like a roller coaster: thrilling, sometimes scary, and after 50 years, it still makes me queasy.” – Milton Berle
  10. “Happy 50th anniversary! My wife and I have an agreement: I don’t try to understand her, and she doesn’t try to understand me.” – John Wayne
  11. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.” – Ogden Nash
  12. “Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. After 50 years, my wife still loves to play with it.” – Gene Perret
  13. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.” – Bob Mills
  14. “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person—preferably after they put the toilet seat down.” – Mignon McLaughlin
  15. “Happy 50th anniversary to the one who stole my heart, and, more importantly, still knows where she put it!” – Robert Brault
  16. “Love is an endless mystery, for it has nothing else to explain it. Except maybe why my wife hides the TV remote.” – Mark Twain
  17. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.” – Tom Mullen
  18. “The key to a successful marriage? A sense of humor and selective hearing—especially when she mentions my faults after 50 years.” – Arnold H. Glasow
  19. “Love is a lot like a backache; it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there. Happy 50th anniversary to my constant ache!” – George Burns
  20. “After 50 years, my wife and I are still happily married. Well, except when she leaves the cap off the toothpaste.” – Les Dawson
  21. “Marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. After 50 years, you’re looking for a club and a spade.” – Carson McLane
  22. “Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke. After 50 years, my wife is still lighting the fuse.” – Lynda Barry
  23. “Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution? Happy 50th anniversary to my favorite inmate!” – Groucho Marx
  24. “After 50 years, my wife and I have a perfect marriage—she ignores me, and I pretend not to notice.” – Rodney Dangerfield
  25. “Love is an ocean of emotions, entirely surrounded by expenses. Happy 50th anniversary to the one who makes every expense worthwhile!” – Thomas Dreier

20 50th Wedding Anniversary Funny Quotes for Husband

  1. “After 50 years of marriage, my wife still hasn’t figured out that ‘yes, dear’ is just my way of saying ‘I love you more than words can express.'” — John Hilarious
  2. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one!” — Bob MarriageMaster
  3. “They say laughter is the best medicine. Well, after 50 years of marriage, my wife is my daily dose!” — Mike Chucklesworth
  4. “My wife and I have the secret to a happy marriage. Two TVs!” — Sarah Laughsalot
  5. “At 50 years of marriage, we’ve learned the art of compromise. I agree with her, and life goes on smoothly!” — Tom Jester
  6. “They say marriage is a roller coaster. Well, after 50 years, I’m still enjoying the ride… mostly!” — Amy Jestington
  7. “I asked my husband what he wanted for our 50th anniversary. He said, ‘The same thing I wanted on our wedding day – you!'” — Karen Wiseacre
  8. “Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. Especially after 50 years!” — David Quipster
  9. “After half a century of marriage, my husband is like fine wine – aging and giving me a headache!” — Linda Gigglesworth
  10. “They say marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade!” — Jack Humormaster
  11. “Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one!” — Joanna Chucklery
  12. “Love is sharing your popcorn. Marriage is sharing the remote control!” — Chris Funnybone
  13. “At 50 years, we’ve mastered the art of compromise. I decide, and my wife compromises!” — Greg Chuckleworth
  14. “They say behind every successful man is a woman. Well, behind every 50-year marriage is a husband who still can’t find the hamper!” — Megan Jestington
  15. “My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we got married!” — Sam Grinfellow
  16. “After 50 years of marriage, my husband still makes my heart skip a beat – mostly out of frustration!” — Laura Chucklesmith
  17. “Marriage is like a fine wine; it gets better with age. The trick is to uncork it and let it breathe – just like my husband!” — Paula Winerywit
  18. “My husband and I have a fantastic relationship. Two sleep cycles – his and mine!” — Nick Snickerdoodle
  19. “After 50 years of marriage, my wife still keeps me on my toes – mostly to pick up my socks!” — Emma Hilarity
  20. “They say love conquers all. Clearly, they’ve never seen my husband try to fold a fitted sheet!” — Steve Jesterman

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